She’s Just A Little Girl
This is something that I have to remind myself often. Especially when it comes to my seven-year old, I find it much easier to remember when it comes to my four-year old. I always have. I have always expected more from Imogen. When I look back on what I expected from her when she was four I kind of cringe. I guess this the curse of being the oldest and born to an older mother who was set in her ways perhaps, and had way to long to build those expectations. You know what I mean. The times when we would see children in public and think, “if they were my kids ….” (fill in the black with all of your ‘non parent’ wisdom HERE). Or, on the other side of that, when I was trying to have a child unsuccessfully for five LONG years and I would see a mother or father completely ignoring their kid begging for gum as they were standing in the line to buy groceries and I would think “NEVER! I will NEVER ignore my children, I will talk to them, I always engage them in stimulating and meaningful conversation”. I didn’t realize that they weren’t ignoring their kids they were simply WORN OUT. They can do that, you know, after the 100th time or begging for something in the grocery store, that DOES tend to happen.
This all being said, I must remember she is just a little girl more often. I know that I am a good mother, but I could be better. Couldn’t we all? I was watching TV making dinner the other day (yes, I have a TV in my kitchen! I know, I know) and I saw the worst thing I have ever seen on TV. I am not going to mention the show but it was basically about a mother abusing her child in the most horrific and twisted unimaginable way, and this is the stuff we were privy to. And the first thing I thought of was ‘ he is just a little boy’ and then I had to turn it off because it made me ache so bad that a child would have to endure anything like this from his own mother. What hope does a child in this situation have?
And as bad as this was, I have to tell you, it doesn’t have to be THAT abusive to have long-term scaring effects on a child. How about a teacher that tells a child in front of their peers that they will be getting a bad report card if they don’t start behaving? Don’t think that kind of shaming isn’t going to have a negative effect on a child. Unfortunately for the child and teacher, probably an immediate effect.
Anyway, I was just thinking about all of this when I was painting this one and I know what I have wrote it is a bit rambling but really what I am trying to say is those words ‘shes just a little girl’ were circling around my head but what I was thinking about was ‘they are just children’ and they are really delicate and we have so much power over them. We all just really need to remember to be kind.