I can’t believe it is already March. I have an auction coming up quickly and I feel like time is just running away from me. Deadlines are a good way to get stuff done; I often need to be held accountable in order to get motivated. I am just way too good at giving into myself if I only have myself to disappoint.
Getting into my studio and back at it has been absolute torture. There are several reasons for my resistance, the first being the move into a smaller space (love my new house but the new studio was not a love at first sight story, unfortunately.) The second reason is the undeniable and absolutely depressing void of inspiration on my part. Maybe the second reason should be moved to the top of the list, after all, when I am inspired, I could paint in a cardboard box, on a cardboard box. So ya, inspiration has been lacking and I really don’t know why. More than likely there isn’t one reason, maybe it is a lot of things. Inspiration isn’t something that can be nailed down and made stay, it really does have a mind of it’s own. Having done this art thing for awhile now, I know that you have to meet the muse half way. Creating art is not about closing your eyes and dreaming about what you would like to create, it is about opening your eyes and actually creating it. Art is very rarely like what your mind’s eye envisions, anyway, art often has a mind of its own and you can’t know that without actually getting your hands dirty. I know all of this but it still didn’t make me felt like painting and when you paint for a living, that is a real problem.
Anyway, like I said, I agreed to do an auction with Stepahnie Gagos in my usual March spot and it worked, I got out there and started playing in my new space, which I am now really starting to love. Thank you to all of you that have continued to cheer me on over the years, your kind words and encouragement really keeps me going .
Eventhough I know that ‘inspiration finds us when we are working’ (my decade old mantra) it doesn't always make it easier to get up off your butt and actually do the work!
Thanks again, and I hope you enjoy my new paintings.
Love,
Maria
Auction Originals
Fragile Dreams
“Human spirit is the ability to face the uncertainty of the future with curiosity and optimism. It is the belief that problems can be solved, differences resolved. It is a type of confidence. And it is fragile. It can be blackened by fear and superstition.”
Bernard Beckett
I have been thinking a lot about how we can sometimes poison our own dreams with doubts, fears and paying way too much attention to those negative voices in our heads. Having many goals and dreams can almost make us more vulnerable. It seems more ambitions can give self doubt a better chance to hit us with their poisonous pill. In this painting, as with most of my art, I am trying to work through what it is going on in my life and the lives of the people I am closest to. I find this process healing and it can also help me understand my feelings, all the while putting something of beauty back into the world. It is like sucking in the negativity of the world and putting something positive back in it’s place.
Her Faith
If fear is cultivated it will become stronger, if faith is cultivated it will achieve mastery.
John Paul Jones
We can so easily lose confidence in ourselves. We buy into our fears. We doubt ourselves, our abilities. This is hard, these are hard times in our lives. It is harder still to watch someone we love sink into this kind of hole of self doubt and even hatred. We can reach our hand toward them, outstretched, grasping for theirs but ultimately, they have to pull themselves out of the darkness. We can’t live someone else's life, their life is their own, we can only be there as a non wavering support of love, encouragement and the occasional kick in the rear.
Girl In A Frilly Hat
11”x15 mix media painting on rag paper.
“Girl in a Frilly Hat” was a subject I painted many times when I started painting on a daily basis almost 15 years ago. 5 year old Imogen was the subject when she put a frilly sash on her head. She was also wearing a pinafore that was mine when I was 5. We go around in circles as I am doing right now. Trying to figure out where I’m going next, I circle my memories, my past, my life. It’s all about turning the wheel to get it in motion again. It’s a hard push but I know I can budge it eventually.
Dreams and Hearts
12”x16” mix media painting on wood.
"There are so many fragile things, after all. People break so easily, and so do dreams and hearts."
- Neil Gaiman
Afternoon Dahlias
15”x19’ mix media painting on rag paper.
“Where flowers bloom, so does hope.”
Lady Bird Johnson
I love how dahlias look like fireworks; like a celebration in your garden all day long.
Dahlias and Hops
18”x24” mix media painting on canvas.
Hops take over the garden and are very scratchy against the skin but I still love them. They are as beautiful when covered in snow on a garden trellis, as they are on a hot summer day or in a beautiful glass vase with a bunch of dahlias.
Fill My Heart With Sweetness
10”x20’ mix media painting on wood.
"Hope is the dream of a soul awake." - French Proverb
Sometimes my heart can feel like a dark place. I can feel bitter, resentful and jealous. During these times I lean into those feelings and pray to come out the other side lighter, in spirit and in my thoughts. My prayers are always to fill my heart with love, with understanding and with sweetness.
Hope Begins In The Dark
12”x16” mix media painting on wood.
"Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come." - Anne Lamott
It is Fragile
6”x12” mix media painting on wood.
"If it were not for hope, the heart would break. " - Greek proverb
Life is precious. Life can be hard. We face challenges everyday and they're not easy. But when we overcome them, life is beautiful.
Love Is the Flower Of Life
12”x 24” mix media painting on wood.
Love is the flower of life, and blossoms unexpectedly and without law, and must be plucked where it is found, and enjoyed for the brief hour of its duration.
D.H. Lawrence
This piece is a little different, I have used encaustics on the whole painting. The colours remind me of spring, which is just around the corner, I hope!
Little Koi
6” x12” mix media painting on wood.
I love painting koi, they are such beautiful and elegant fish. I have always wanted to move back to a place where I could actually keep a pond in my backyard but then again, that seems like a lot of work. I’ll just have to settle for painting them! Also, they are thought to be lucky and prosperous, so that is a bonus!
Push You Forward
12” x16” mix media painting on wood.
“Remember forward movement. Forward is the way of trust. Forward is the way of forgiveness. Forward is the way of action. Forward is the way of healing. Forward is essentially life.”
Victoria Erickson
This girl was a bit of a breakthrough painting this year. I have been struggling with finding inspiration and direction in my art. I felt compelled to try something new so I took myself to my local art store to find a new art supply to play with. I found this red gesso and it has been so great to work with. This painting got so much love when I put it up on instagram and although that shouldn't be what I rely on to stay motivated or get inspired, it didn't hurt. It is why I will never stop putting my in progress shots up, it is so great to feel connected to the world when you are working alone in your studio. I appreciate you guys so much. Know that.
This Fragile Thread That Binds Us
8”x8” mix media painting on 3” deep canvas.
"Don`t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is this fragile thread that binds us to each other." - Brian Dyson
I love painting these deep canvases. It is so fun to continue the painting around the sides. They become sculptural when hung on the wall or even sitting on a shelf.
This Girl
10”x10” mix media painting on wood.
Sixteen is such a hard age, but really, if we are honest, what age isn't? They all have their challenges. None of us escape this. We all have secrets, cracks, fears; we aren't immune and we don't grow into adulthood and suddenly have all the answers. Many adults are just as dumb, misinformed and clueless as any sixteen year old can be! More so, because they have been doing it for longer. None of us really know what we are doing, not entirely. We bumble through life, making messes along the way, occasionally getting it right. We surprise ourselves and pat ourselves on the back only to stumble over the next hurdle. Life is hard at sixteen and it is hard at fifty-five too. I am sometimes more immature than my teenage children, my feelings get hurt, I sulk, I get hung up on unimportant things. Life is life, you learn as you go and you often relearn stuff over and over.
This Girl ( the painting, the teen and me ) does not have all the answers and she never will but she sure is amazing all the same.
Your Life Is a Breath
10”x10” mix media painting on wood.
"Even in our best shape we are a brittle piece of mortality. Your life is a breath, don’`t waste it." - Lecrae
Do Ordinary Things With Intensity
11”x15” mix media painting on rag paper.
“Do not try to do extraordinary things but do ordinary things with intensity.”
— Emily Carr
This painting is a reminder to stay present.
The Strongest Love
3” x18” mixed media painting on wood.
"The strongest love is the love that can demonstrate its fragility." - Paulo Coelho
She holds the greatest heart of all. The heart that has been entrusted with all of our dreams. A mother's love is absolute, unshakeable, and everlasting.